June

HELL ON WHEELS, ROCKWELL ON PARADE, DRACULA ON CAPE COD.

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JUNE FILM FESTIVALS

5th: NEWPORT INTERNATIONAL FILM FESTIVAL, RHODE ISLAND. Fourth annual in historic Newport.

6th: NASHVILLE INDEPENDENT FILM FESTIVAL, TENNESSEE. One of the country's longest-running festivals.

8th: FLORIDA FILM FESTIVAL, ORLANDO.

Prizes include Florida swampland.

10th: FLICKAPALOOZA FILM FESTIVAL, LOS ANGELES. Brought to you by the people behind Scripfapalooza.

20th: NANTUCKET FILM FESTIVAL, MASSACHUSETTS. Dedicated to screenwriters.

1 Twentieth Century Fox releases DVDs of Marilyn Monroe's five best films to honor her 75th birthday; gay men declare national holiday.

2 From buppie rags to body bags: Cosby's Phylicia Rashad enters day two of the run of Blue, a musical comedy set in a funeral home, at N.Y.C.'s Gramercy Theatre.

3 Tony Awards. Nervous thespian casts pall over audience with lengthy speech chronicling his fascinating acting "choices."

4 Poets and authors discuss their work for the second day of "The Brave New Word," at N.Y.C.'s Guggenheim Museum. Look for the "Text Rain" installation; bring umbrella or Wite-Out.

5 Eartha Kitt plays the Fairy Godmother in Rodgers & Hammerstein's Cinderella in Costa Mesa, California. Act II: Cinderella is eaten alive.

6 Los Angeles Opera's season closes with a revival of Puccini's Tosco. Hefty baritone packs suitcase for return trip to Milan, launches into small frenzy of sobbing, pasta.

7 The creators of N.Y.C's Classic Stage Company's In the Penal Colony are two exes who "reassert their non matrimonial vows to existential theater together." (The theater is located in the East Village.)

8 American Ballet Theatre's production Don Quixote. Sets and costumes by Santo Loquasto, who's worked with the American Don Quixote: Woody Allen.

9 Townspeople of Stockbridge, Mass., parade to the Norman Rockwell Museum dressed as their favorite Rockwell characters. Oh, those loopy Waspsl Too much fun.

10 The Philadelphia Museum of Art unveils exhibition of designs from the Venturi, Scott Brown and Associates architecture firm. Are architects born able to do perfect block lettering, or do they learn it?

11 "Picasso: The Artist's Studio" opened this weekend at Hartford's Wadsworth Atheneum Museum of Art. What we think when we think "Picasso's studio": a beret rack and a mattress for sexing.

12 The Metropolitan Museum of Art opens a show of Terry Winters's prints, including linoleum cuts. Linoleum is our favorite kitchenmuseum crossover.

13 Ja, ja, hot on ze heels of ze Venice Biennale, dahlink, is being Art Basel, in Basel, Switzerland. I am absolutely ecstatic on this.

14 Start thinking of teddibly witty remarks to make at Lord Snowdon's retrospective at the Yale Center for British Art, which opens this weekend.

15 Mor, mor, mor: London's Hayward Gallery offers a retrospective of Malcolm Money's paintings, models, and holograms. (Note, Malcolm Moriey did not write Under the Volcano. That was Malcolm Lowry.)

16 Golden Ages: Masterpieces of Dutch and Danish Painting" at Amsterdam's Rijksmuseum, a reminder to us Americans that since the Golden Age of television we have had no golden age to call our own.

17 Day three of "Cars & Guitars of Rock 'n' Roll" at L.A.'s Petersen Automotive Museum. Cadzillal

18 Cape Cod's renowned Cape Playhouse opens its season with Dracula: 10:30 A.M.—prop master denudes cranberry bog in preparation for blood-making.

19 Houston's Museum of Fine Arts' "The Cos Cob Art Colony" opened this week and features that other kind of Connecticut impressionism (Childe Hassam, John Twachtman), not the teemany-martoonies kind.

20 "Vermeer and the Delft School" travels from New York to London's National Gallery. Girl with Pearl Earring racks up frequent-flier

21 San Francisco's Exploratorium brings you the solar eclipse via the Internet (www .exploratorium.edu /eclipse), and you won't have to make a pinhole on your computer

23 Denver Art Museum: "European Masterpieces: Six Centuries of Paintings from the National Gallery of Victoria, Australia." Throw another El Greco on the barbie, mate.

24 Thirteen/WNET's Dance in America looks at modern dance's AfricanAmerican roots. We applaud any PBS venture that does not feature extreme close-ups of bugs.

Father's Day on the 17th.

26 The VH1 Save the Musk photography exhibition and auction held in N.Y.C., with proceeds to help develop musk programs at publk schools. "Look, Dick. Look, Sally. A slide trombone!"

27 Part IV of the Metropolitan Museum of Art's tribute to 20th-century design chronicles 1975-2000 and opened yesterday. Messrs. Venturi, Starck, Gehry to the podium.

28 N.Y.C.'s Whitney Museum's retrospective of Wayne Thiebaud, best known for his depictions of cakes and pies: expect the Whitney's food concession to do very, very well during this show.

29 Wait Until Dark at the Long Beach Playhouse in Long Beach, Calif. How will they re-create Alan Arkin's enormous, feline leap in movie? We're thinking: body harness.

30 Chicago's Museum of Contemporary Art opens its retrospective of H. C. Westermann's art, which The New York Times called "kooky, often aggressively pessimistic"—it's Janeane Garofalo, oils.