Roseanne's Fifth

SPOTLIGHT

roseanne believes

in the magic of numbers. One of hers is five and so she is seen here full of her fifth child, who is to answer to the shouted or purred handle "Buck." One of my numbers is three. As in blind mice; faces of Eve; -inch penis; bears; strikes; father, son, and Holy Ghost; and the homespun wisdom "Third time's the charm."

Roseanne is seen here with her charming third man, Ben Thomas, who is her protective husband, other half, and wholehearted good sort. He's gearing up for his new identity as Buck's pop. "The Buck pops here," we say as we point somewhere south of Roseanne's impressive navel and smile an impish grin.

Full of different things at all times (alternately, for example, she might be full of fun, beans, the dickens, mischief, shit, or foreboding), Roseanne emanates mainly life. Ben has dragged this Sumerian fertility goddess by her ragged brown hair screaming and laughing all the way back to their spacious Brentwood love cave. There, the loudest woman on three networks, with a bra size that would bankrupt most alphabets, has grown quiet and expectant, gazing at her Everyman caveman in the campfire light. He has once again bonked and bagged some wild, nutritious chow for this boisterous ball and chain, to nosh and feed to their baby Buckmeister (the Buckmaestro, conductor of light).

They wait in giddy suspense for Miss Roseanne to finally fulfill her fate in this primitive world and painfully pass the Buck.

CARRIE FISHER