How to have élan

COREY FORD

God's Gift to the Motion Picture Business —that's what they call William Sune out in Hollywood today. For Mr. Sune, it seems, has discovered the secret of acquiring Screen Charm and 'IT'; and his slim volume, diligently studied from cover to cover, is guaranteed to put any struggling young actor on his feet, usually in front of a casting-window from nine to five.

Moreover, they say it is due to Mr. Sune's hook that the art of the motion-picture has taken such tremendous strides today. So tremendous have been some of these strides, in fact, that already the art of the motion-picture is almost back where it started from, in the old Biograph days.

This long-awaited manual, for the discovery of which I am indebted to Mr. J. M. Kerrigan, bears the pat title Charm, Enthusiasm, and Originality: Their Acquisition and Use. In a modest foreword—and should any skeptical reader doubt that I am quoting Mr. Sune's work verbatim, be may write personally to the Elan Publishing Company at 3902 West Sixth Street, Los Angeles—the author admits that bis book "explains bow actors, salesmen and orators can learn to read, act and feel over two hundred different emotions arranged as they increase in violence in fifty vividly diverse groups." It tells bow to brighten the eyes and vibrate the voice impressively. It tells bow to maintain the nerves, muscles, teeth, hair and correct weight. It also teaches, to con a few promising chapters from the Table of Contents, Enthusing Your Voice Impressively, Radiating Charming Mental Pictures, and Acquiring Screen Charm and 'IT'. If pressed, it will probably answer the telephone and do the upstairs work.

Mr. Sune's handbook thus explains the second curious phenomenon that greeted me upon my own arrival in sun-kissed California. (The first curious phenomenon was the sun itself, which kissed California once during three dreary and fog-bound months, and apparently kissed it good-bye.) The casual visitor to the film capitol, accustomed to the rigorous discipline of a Puritan East, is apt to he a trifle overwhelmed by the generous display of emotions that he encounters in Hollywood. The simplest business transaction, in America's screen center, is played like a dramatic scene to the very hilt. The simplest dinner-order, here in the movie citadel, is served with the passionate intensity of a bit from Camille. Every housemaid and elevator-boy radiates potential Screen Charm and 'IT'. Every loiterer on Vine Street sighs, grimaces, winces, smiles wearily, and casts seductive glances in the best manner of his or her favorite screen star. The salesgirl in the Ambassador sells you soap with the tragic aloofness of a Garbo, the soda-clerk jerks a milk-shake with the shy smile of a Leslie Howard, the telephone operator repeats your number with the coy titter of a Norma Shearer. Every waitress in the Brown Derby is an embryo Connie Bennett, every taxidriver a Wallace Beery, every stenographer a Joan Crawford, every life-guard a Joel McCrae. Morning, noon and night they bombard you with Charm, they lambast you with Personality, they wallop you with Enthusiasm. You never saw so much Elan in all your life.

Well, now I understand. Now I realize that they are merely ambitious students of Mr. Sune's little manual, practicing their homework. They are just embryo actors, or, as they refer to them here in California, native Sunes.

It is electricity, according to Mr. Sune, that is the basis of Charm, Originality, Enthusiasm, Magnetism, and Elan. In Hollywood, he finds, 'IT' is "as common as honesty in the banking-business". (You can figure that one out for yourself.) A1 Jolson, Clara Bow and Napoleon are "examples of persons with Elan". Charles Rogers, Billie Dove and Vilma Bankv "typify a charming natural form of 'IT'." William Tilden and Reginald Denny have a lot of electricity, too. The whole trick, Mr. Sune explains, lies in not losing too much electricity at once. "If, in bathing, only a small part of the body is allowed to become wet at any one time," for example, "then no electricity is wasted. One should place a towel on the floor and stand on it, then wash the face, then dry it, then the arms, then the chest, then the back, and then each leg separately." Brightening the eyes is accomplished by dancing with a bright-eyed partner of the opposite sex "if the dancing is not too prolonged". You can have a magnetic personality by radiating charming mental pictures, or eating lettuce.

Moreover, in order to make sure that the embryo student does not confuse one emotion with another, Mr. Sune illustrates his volume with a photographic gallery of one hundred and thirty-six sample emotions, all experienced and tested personally by Mr. Sune himself; and it is through his kind permission that we are privileged to reproduce a few of these illustrations here. By studying this table carefully, we may discover that the Emotion of "Frenzy" is produced simply by pursing the lips and emitting what appears to be a low whistling sound. The Emotion of "Cold" consists of placing one finger on the upper lip as :f to stop a sneeze. That fine distinction between "Drunkenness" and "Intoxication" is cleared up at last by Mr. Sune's simple discovery: in "Drunkenness" the head is turned to the right, whereas in "Intoxication" it faces to the left.

Here we may also observe some striking comparisons between our finer emotions. Note, for example, the hair-line distinction between "Rheumatism" and "IT". Note that by simply opening the mouth a little wider, we pass at once from "Chivalry" to "Delirium Tremens". Note the remarkable affinity between "Eroticism" and "Indigestion".

In fact, it is to guard against any such unfortunate confusion of Emotions, and avoid the embarrassing consequences of trying to seduce your objet d'arnour, for example, with an attack of Rheumatism, that Mr. Stine has devoted the final chapter of his opus to a carefully itemized list of One Hundred and Fifteen Handy Emotions for the Home. These exalted feelings he has grouped conveniently under the general heading Emotional Muscular Contractions; and the whole chapter land you can look it up for yourself if you think I'm kidding) is entitled Emotions Displayed on a Lion Hunt.

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According to the plot of this chapter, the hero decides to hunt lions (Emotions of Consent, Acquiescence and Compliance). Lions, it appears, "double one up with laughter" (Emotions of Clee, Jollity and Hilarity) ; but he will not take a machine-gun (Negation). As a result, the lion escapes (Anger, Fury and Madness), and the hero, broken-hearted, decides that his "girl won't love him" (Emotions of Weeping, Lamentation, Sobbing and Wailing). He falls asleep; and, if I follow the plot correctly at this point, the girl instantly arrives. "It can't he her!" the hero exclaims (Emotions of Skepticism, Incredulity and Bad Grammar), only to discover that "a lion is chasing her, attacking her, and knocking her down" (here we have a whole gamut of Emotions, ranging from Dismay, through Panic, to Horror, Delirium Tremens, Mania, and Spasms). While he is reproaching himself because "he should have rescued her" (Guilt), the lion conveniently runs away again and his girl is saved; and in a final hurst of mingled Emotions the hero demonstrates in rapid succession that he loves her, that he is hungry, that he has a toothache, that he hates to spend money, and that most girls invite him to dinner.

And this (I am still quoting Mr. Sune verbatim) is how it is done:

"To produce I for example! the Emotions of Affection, Adoration, Love and Passion: Visualize 'You will always love me'. Then raise the outer corners of the mouth; separate the teeth and lips; during the embrace raise the corners of the eyebrows near the nose which produces horizontal wrinkles less than two inches long. Ladies roll their eyes up or close their eyes light and lean backwards; men slightly close their eyes and lean forwards; both will breathe very slowly and deeply, causing their chests to go up and down.

"To produce the Emotions of Content, Enjoyment, Satisfaction, and Gratification: Visualize 'Most girls invite me to dinner'. Then fold the arms; lean backwards; protrude the abdomen; spread the feet apart; lick the teeth with the tongue; chew with the lips closed; speak with a satisfied tone. Chewing-gum exhausts a person's feeling of contentment.

"To produce the Emotions of Mirth, (dee, Jollity and Hilarity: Visualize 'Lions double one up with laughter'.

Then slap your friend on the hack with the palm of your hand: poke your friend lightly on the shoulder with your clenched fist; pinch your friend's ear with your fingers; pat your friend's cheek five times in two seconds with the palm side of your fingers; place your hand horizontally upon your friend's forehead so as to suddenly push your hand hack through his hair; send your friend sprawling with a kick from the rear."

Your friend, it is assumed, will probably he producing meantime the Emotions of Dislike, Aversion, and Enmity, which also are demonstrated by a kick from the rear, only harder.

As a matter of fact, it was this last description which gave me an idea for a somewhat wider application of Mr. Sune's little work. After all, not many of us are apt to go off on a lion hunt; and it is possible that a more universal plot would lend the book a wider reading public, extending even outside the cinema colony. Let us suppose, just for instance, that Mr. Sune had had a chapter in his book entitled, offhand, "Emotions Displayed on Going to See a Show in a Theater."

The hero of this chapter, as I see it, would he pretty irritable anyway, and would only he going to the theater in the first place because he had been given free seats. Moreover, the usher has kept him standing in line half an hour while he seated a dozen people, apparently all relatives, who arrived after our hero did (Emotion of Irritation). He is eventually seated across the aisle from an elderly lady who is eating some kind of nut-candy that crunches (Emotion of Increasing Irritation and Gooseflesh). The man directly behind our hero either heats time steadily with his shoe on the hack of our hero's seat, or else inserts his toe suddenly in the space at the rear of the seat and causes our hero to leap forward unexpectedly and bite his tongue (Irritation and a Slight Giddy Feeling). There is a baby three seats away who is crying steadily (Increasing Giddiness), and up in the balcony a jokester in the audience persists in blowing a Bronx-Cheer gadget every time there is an embrace upon the screen (Frenzy). And, to cap our story, the stage-show takes an hour and three quarters and concludes with a soprano singing Joyce Kilmer's Trees (sudden and complete Mental Blank).

This is how I would handle the Emotional Muscular Contractions:

To achieve the Emotion of Complete Satisfaction: Visualize "I wish 1 had about a .44 Colt with six shells." Then go out and get a .44 Colt with six shells; come back into the theater; load the Colt; shoot in rapid succession the usher, the lady with the nutcandy, the man behind you, the baby, the jokester, and the soprano singing Trees.

And if anyone objects, you can lay the whole thing to Elan.